Biological Clock??

As most of you know David and I just celebrated our 2 year anniversary on the 27th of December (YAY to us!) Our first two years have been blissful to say the least and full of many ups and downs that we call life. It is sufficient to say that I love that man of mine more then I could ever imagine possible. He truly is my other half, the half that my heart beats on, to be exact and I am so grateful to have in in my life.. 


But wait?? What does all this mushiness have to do with my title? Don't worry, I will tell you..


Well, since the day David and I hit that blissful two year mark we've been bombarded with the baby question and it has been the cause for much discussion in the Pyne household. So I thought I would take a minute and get out all my feelings on the matter. 


I.am.terrified. 


I have spouts of pure excitement where the idea of it makes me giddy inside. I start to think about what they may look like and the wonderful role of being a mother. I think about how excited I am to implement schedules and routines, teaching and growing. I am excited to hold something so special, something that David and I helped create and bring to this Earth, a special spirit that will complete us as a family. All of this truly excites me. 
BUT
On the other hand I cant honestly fathom how we could support a little one now or even down the road while David is still in school. It is scary to think about being entirely responsible for a little human being, something so precious and perfect that I am afraid I will mess everything up. I also have my selfish issues like the time and sleep that will be gone and that nothing is a 'quick errand' anymore. David and I will no longer be just the two of us. Having a baby will change our lives for ever.


Needless to say I am thinking that the whole baby thing may have to happen  by accident. Every time David and I agree to start trying, I chicken out. It is a vicious cycle that I haven't seem to have gotten a grip of. David probably thinks I am crazy because I talk as if I am baby hungry and then freak out when action is required. Ahhh! I just have to take the plunge and get over all of this! But how?? Sometimes I tell myself, 'lets just try and see what happens, it may take a couple of months, who knows!' But then what if it didn't?! There's no turning back if you get pregnant. You cant try it out and then decide your not ready. What's done is done, no turning back allowed! Ugh. I have issues.  


So when will that life altering, special day happen?? 
That is the question of the year. :)


Grateful Goal
1. I am grateful for a job
2. I am grateful when my family comes and visit's us in UT
3. I am grateful for the sun these last couple days
4. I am grateful for the gym
5. I am grateful for my hard working husband!


P.S.
All you savvy bloggers out there..
How do I "follow" someone's blog?? (like be a follower type thing)